Where Am I?

I open the door with such force that it knocks out the ignorant woman, yapping on her cell phone and chomping on three sticks of gum, who walks behind me. Now inside, I find myself at the back of the line. As usual, the first target falls easily. The second, as simply as the first. After the third I felt a sense of discomfort as he fell with a little too much ease. Did they set me up? How could they know I would come? Well, I suppose the fact that I venture in 3-5 times per week could count as a hint but nevertheless, they had me perturbed. As I bided my time behind the fourth, I planned my assault. The options appeared endless, yet I decided on demanding many things and if they could not deliver, I would hit them where it hurts. 

"What will it be sir?" - Male #1.

"The works." - Me.

"Excuse me?" - Male #1.

I just stood there and stared directly into his small, dilated, shiny, despairing pupils. Quickly, I glanced down at my wallet, jerked my head at it, and then returned my gaze at the man. He understands. Pulling out the goods from under a shelf he begins to prepare them. Nervously, the man continues glancing in the direction of my wallet as though it has it's own life force. 

"You know we don't accept those." - Male #1.

"You'll shut your mouth if you know what's good for you, you pumpkin pie hair-cutted freak!" - Me.

"Sir..." - Male #1.

"Quiet! Just make it and bag it." - Me. 

The whole place now stares at me. They all want to know how I hold so much power in the establishment. I can tell that I frighten some, and disgust others. Yet they do not concern me, for I have come for one thing, and one thing only. The man passes it on to his next colleague who rubs me completely wrong from the start: 

 

"What else would you like sir?" - Female #1. 

"JUST MAKE IT D****T!! Make it, wrap it, and bag it. Now." - Me.

Her hands moved as fast a black belt performing a Judo chop while she completed my request. After what felt like hours, she finished. I could feel eyes boring holes in my back, others seeking a similar objective. However, I let it worry me not. They could wait. At long last, I grabbed the bag and tried to make a dash for the door but heard a petite voice say:

"That will be $6.65" - Female #2. 

And then my conscience tried to take over. 

(Comment: Where am I? How does the story resolve?)

My Journey

            56.8%. Failing. Nearly academically ineligible. I began the 2012-13 school year with this miserable F in AP English following a summer of blogs, comments and annotations. I do not admit proudly, yet I will confess that Ms. Serensky felt that my summer blogs and comments merited a 68%. Now I understand that I did not perform to my highest ability on a single blog over the summer. I even bored myself with some of them, but upon receiving that D+, it opened my eyes that maybe Ms. Serensky does in fact read all 40 or so blogs each week and grade them for quality rather than simply completion. Therefore, when our maestro told us that our final exam consists of a series of blogs, and that our personal writing experience will continue, I saw it as a chance at redemption. A shot to show her and my classmates that if I want to, I can write with heart, passion, and a unique voice. I am not naive enough to say that I have the grammar skills or polished writing of a Meghan Judge, however I will write an interesting and entertaining piece for the enjoyment of my teacher and peers. However, the assignment tells me to first discuss my most well-written blog, and I shall obey the task at hand. 

             Ergo, I believe that my most recent work, which I titled "The Oracle?", serves as my best in terms of style, mechanics, and complexity. Above all else, I feel proud of the way that I presented the blog, while I simply wrote in the first-person viewpoint, I utilized an inanimate object as my narrator which I found very challenging at first. Yet as I grew more comfortable with the idea, I began to have fun with the project and find an amusing voice to fit to the narrator. Also, I very much like the organization I used in the writing. An introduction, and then three very specific events which I analyzed in great detail, split into four separate paragraphs. In short, I pride myself most grammatically on this piece I call "The Oracle?".

             My second task tells me to discuss my most interesting blog over the course of the semester and one clearly jumps out in my mind. I titled it, "This means WAR!" and focused the piece around adultery and my perception of the class' opinion of it. I enjoyed psycho-analyzing the personalities in the class and making predictions upon which side they would support. I feel I presented the matter in a very compelling manner which manifests as true seeing as how I received two comments on the post. Furthermore, the general topic of the writing excited me and made me delve into human nature which always proves interesting. Yet to conclude, the two comments greatly flattered me and led me to believe that I wrote this one best.

             Finally, the assignment dictates that I talk about my favorite remark someone commented on my blog. It appears underneath a blog that won me a spot on the blog show which I titled, "Flaw in the Establishment." My ex-writing partner, Alyssa Marquette made the statement and I just find myself a little jealous that I did not think to include it in my original post for it relates so well. Her final sentence reads, "The pigeons may poop on us stone statues today, but we must stay calm to stand even taller tomorrow." I wish I had collaborated with Alyssa so that I had had the intuition to close out my blog with this sentence however I am quite content with seeing it as a comment. 

               To close I would just like to say one final sentence: Blogs have served as my nemesis, yet I try with each passing week to turn them into a friend. 

The Oracle?

          I sit wedged between the dictionaries day in and day out, vigilantly observing the ongoings of the classroom and the personnel inside. I have staked my mark as the only constant in Ms. Serensky’s room in recent years, well, that and the Youngstown State University pennant that demands respect from all present in the room. Yet many have never taken notice of my presence, I like to think of myself as the all-seeing and all-knowing eye that covertly acts in cahoots with Ms. Serensky, while outwardly appearing neutral. Please, allow me to elaborate on several happenings that I feel need further discussion.

The bee sting. The unforgettable, irreversible incident that makes Ms. Serensky seem even more formidable to incoming students than ever. An accident by chance? Please. I carefully orchestrated the attraction of the bees to the location of the boy’s seat in hopes that one may insert it’s toxin in him. Why you may ask? To discourage any future weaklings from enrolling in the class. I can no longer tolerate immature children, or even worse, immature writers participating. No longer will students that, for example, feel the need to manhandle me walk through the sacred archway. 

  The worst day of my life. I shall not name names, primarily because I do not concern myself with petty matters such as that, however a student one day decided to lift me out of my location of observation and awkwardly run about the room making obscene moans from behind my face. Unless I am very much mistaken, my protegee filmed this absurd action to further my embarrassment and put it on the new social network, “InstaTweet.” Have the students no decency anymore? Do we not respect our elders? I become more and more perturbed by the actions and comments of the students who consider themselves, the elites of English.

Discussions. The time where Ms. Serensky may gauge the student’s mental capacity in a form other than written expression. I quite enjoy monitoring the discussions for many of the students make strange, irrelevant, and/or ignorant comments on the regular. I have yet to discover a pattern for whom makes the strange and irrelevant comments but only Adam seems to make ignorant comments on a daily basis. Nevertheless, similar to Ms. Serensky, I find the daily discussion periods intriguing and can almost seamlessly predict the order of the speakers and whom will contradict whom. 

I chose Ms. Serensky’s room for I believe that she fosters the most debate amongst her students which allows me the best access to see into their minds. I nearly forgot to mention the reason for my diligent observation sessions, ehh perhaps I will wait until the next blog to enlighten you all. John Rydquist out!

Bobbie Jo Carraway... Oh Sorry, I Mean Nick Serensky?

I sat in class on Friday attempting to see the class and those in it from the perspective of Ms. Serensky. I tried to envision how she must see us. The task proved difficult for Ms. Serensky seems like a part of us, the group, yet detached in a superior sort of way as well. Then it hit me: The synonymous nature between Nick Carraway and Ms. Serensky astounds me. Nick finds himself as the intermediary for the materialistic and the unmaterialistic, while our teacher finds herself identifying with the task-masters, and the more laid-back students. Whilst Nick attends lavish parties in The Great Gatsby, he does not partake in the obessessing over material goods or substances as the other party-goers do. Similarly, Ms. Serensky sees herself in both types of students in the class, therefore can make accurate inferences in regards to each. Furthermore, I find it interesting how each enjoy simply sitting back and observing the ongiongs of the "party." Nick uses the outrageous parties Gatsby throws as a vehicle to monitor the actions of New York City's elite. Likewise, Ms. Serensky utilizes the classroom as a vehicle to monitor the actions of Chagrin Falls High School's "elite." Despite the fact that Fitzgerald wrote his novel in the early twentieth century and now nearly a century has passed, I see uncanny commonalities between even the personas at the parties and in the classroom. We have dominating figures, we have the quiet yet powerful, we have the loud but transparent, and we definitely have ladies trying to "swoon" the men of our class. This leads me back to the statement - "There is nothing new under the sun." Such a resounding statement with enormous impact if it holds true. Well clearly, in terms personalities in public places, the claim stands strong. Meanwhile, all this time Ms. Serensky sits back and observes. She sees the interactions between us immature adolescents and carefully notes them for her amusement I beleive. In mirror movements, Nick also stands apart from the party and takes note of the immature ADULTS who make fools of themselves in spite of the grandeur of the evening, simply for his enjoyment! If only Nick would try to play matchmaker amongst the guests, comparitively to how Ms. Serensky pairs writing partners to foster and encourage debate and quarrel. If this occurred, I would undertake the suspicion that Ms. Serensky uses F. Scott Fitzgerald as a pseudonym and crafted The Great Gatsby while envisioning herself as Nick!

Flaw in the Establishment

"Sometimes you are the pigeon, Sometimes you are the statue." A bird sits atop a statue covered in feces in the poster which displays the above quote. Not one day has passed in AP English, this year or last, that I have not taken note of the poster and self-evaluated whether the bird or the statue better fit my mentality on that particular day. The bird- on top of the world, graceful, content, and pooping on whatever happens to pass underway. The statue- lonely, filthy, victimized, and at the will of all animate objects. Some days I think about how similar to the statue my day progresses, and others, undoubtedly I feel like the pigeon. Yet upon recent observations of the poster, I stumbled upon a newfound realization. In my humble opinion, the creators of the poster woefully messed up! Allow me to explain. If anyone has studied the image as thoroughly as I, I would expect them to approach the same conclusion that I have: the statue represents the better human being and lifestyle! Take another glance at the poster! Why does the poster imply that we should put ourselves above others and sit on them and make them feel like crap (no pun intended!)? If I may re-analyze the figures: the bird- cocky, superior, ignorant, and one that must put others down to lift themselves up. Meanwhile the statue- selfless, independent, calm, and unaffected by other's rudeness. I am rather confused as to the creator's motive behind the poster and whether they recognize this as I have. Or, whether they assumed people would understand that the statue clearly embodies better character traits than the condescending pigeon and I have simply misinterpreted it these past years. Otherwise, why would these people advocate putting others down, and asserting our superiority over them as the pigeon has done? Has faculty not taught the students since day one to not let others affect us no matter how they treat us? As the articulate Allen Iverson once said, "homie, you gotta do you" I believe the statue perfectly practices this behavior. The statue remains standing and does not allow the defecating pigeon deter him from watching over the city! He ignores the "bully" and does not show weakness whatsoever yet refuses to retaliate in any manner. I greatly admire these positive and peaceful qualities in the stone. I did not reach this conclusion until today however, which just proves how if someone searches for hidden meaning long enough in something, they will find it. Therefore, I believe someone on the team that designed that poster must have recognized this flaw and simply wants those who ponder it long enough to achieve this insight. Please just take a quick glance at the image and reconsider which YOU prefer to act like and remember the personality traits I have identified in each.

This Means WAR!

I foresee a war. A great, nasty war. A war so immense that even those beyond petty high schooler's feelings, such as Ms. Serensky, cannot help but partake in. A war comparable to WWI in magnitude and participants. I foresee a war amongst the geniuses of AP English 12 - 7th period.
              In recent weeks, I have noticed a singular common theme in the stories we have read thus far: adultery. Oh, what an ugly word. Disloyalty. Infidelity. Immorality. No one wants to have such a label and all shy away from the mark. However, I have learned that such a topic evokes great conversation in our class for it seems like we try to spend as much time as possible discussing hanky-panky. Over the last three reads, a certain divide has sprung up in the class, those who abhor the practice, versus those who find ways to justify it. Initially, only a few people in the class fought the war, the extremists. Derek and Lauren versus Kate and Alex, Italy and Germany versus Great Britain and Russia.We rather tentatively put forth our opinions of the matter and merely waded into neutral waters. Few sides formed, and even fewer alliances. No one could risk angering the almighty force, the force that no one dared to cross, the force that nearly guarantees victory in any verbal or written debate which had yet to enter the conflict, Ms. Serensky, or to continue the metaphor, the United States of America. Next, The Winter's Tale re-excited our strange point of contention upon Leontes' accusation that Hermione cheats on him. In this battle I firmly staked my ground with the Axis in their stand against adultery at all costs. My current writing partner, Claire, opposed me and justified disloyalty for true love. I felt as siblings did when they crossed one another in the Revolutionary War. However, still no one portrayed their rage, or threw moral cheap shots, or hand-grenades, at one another. Rather contradictorily, we feigned calm and politely discussed our opinions of the matter in vague terms. Now, we reside in the present, on the brink of battle, and utter anarch. In our story, The Great Gatsby, we learn that Tom, frequently and openly, cheats on his wife which blatantly begs one's judgement of the deed. Today's discussion represented the assassination of the Archduke Ferdinand. Teams formed, sides aligned, and tempers flared. Or so we thought. Until someone who claimed to have a "soft spot for Tom" changed his mind! Derek, in congruence with Italy, switches his opinion and now supports the Allies because for Tom, he can validate infidelity! This monumental moment greatly shifted the balance of power I had so carefully calculated in my mind to equilibrium, foreshadowing a clash of equally powerful foes. Please Ms. Serensky, give us insight as to where you stand so that one side may back down and we may prevent this catastrophic collision of ideologies.

Pink and Flashy, Apparently My Style

I hate journal days. Actually, I enjoy writing in them because I have no fear of Ms. Serensky's instant and seldom positive (in my case) feedback, yet I still despise journal days. Last year I felt no such emotion, however due to my pink and flashy notebook, I now dread hearing, "Open up your journals, write today's date, and this will be entry number seven." I remember our assignment on the first day of school to bring in a notebook with a cover that represented us and our personality. Well, as usual, it slipped my mind, and I had to resort to stealing said journal out of my six year old sister's backpack. Needless to say, the tiny drama queen discovered with terror her missing notebook yet I will save the full story for a future time. As I walked to class that day, I planned to present my journal to my honorable writing partner, Lauren, as somewhat of a joke to mask my embarrassment. As always, she took it in stride which did not irk me then as it does now. Why, why did she expect nothing less than for me to bring in a pink notebook with flowers on the front cover? I do not consider myself a very funny kid, and do not believe my classmates perceive me that way either, therefore Lauren could not have foreseen a joke which means she must have simply expected me to bring in something different! Until very recently this event did not bother me, yet over the last 72 hours, nothing else has broached my mind. Time and again the justification has eluded me... Until now. As insensible as this sounds, I believe that people expect me to bring the exact opposite of what I should bring to the table! Let us look at the most current writing partner situation for example, I certainly remember Claire exclaiming with joy when Ms. Serensky set our AP English fates together for she sees me as an intelligent guy. Should not that have a direct correlation with quality of writing partner? So Claire believed. Unfortunately, her expectations and my production do not tend to coincide for I seem to consistently do the exact opposite of what I am expected. Do not get the impression that I think of this as a curse however, for it works positively in the realm of sports for example. If a bystander saw me they would not receive the impression that I am an athlete, although I actually hold my own rather well in the sports world. Come on - a gangly, big-footed kid? Yessir, since I am expected to fail, I strive to succeed. Therefore, after examining these two unrelated fields, I have reached the conclusion that perhaps my pink and girly notebook really DOES represent me well. Since I am expected to do the unexpected, should I fret when someone thinks of me strangely or differently? I feel as though I am the incarnate form of the old saying, "expect the unexpected." Or perhaps, as in "The Balloon," I am simply trying to find significance in an event that yields no deeper meaning whatsoever.